Solitude

The benefits of solitude – do you feel overwhelmed? In need of a vacation? Constantly exhausted? Maybe what you need instead is some peace and quiet. When is the last time you took time for yourself, I mean serious alone time, just for your mental health?

 

I know I find it difficult most days to carve out any time for my writing – this is my single biggest struggle in life.  With all the pressures on the modern person, when do you have time for yourself to gather your thoughts and remove yourself from the stresses of your life?  What happens when you don’t?  For me, I get into a downward emotional spiral that causes me feelings of inadequacy and doubt.  It sabotages my creativity by making me feel like I can do nothing right, worse, I can’t even find the time in a day to make bad art.  I have been trying to carve out some time each morning to write.  I can say that I’ve done a much better job since April of this year than any of the previous 25 years – but I still struggle with it every morning due to “things beyond my control.”  Things like dogs shitting on the floor, or the morning routine that needs to happen to get everyone fed and calmed down before the day starts – sometimes that still doesn’t leave any time for reflection and thought.

 

As I get older, I realize I need this more, and drastically miss it when it’s not done.  I lost my father three months ago, and realize more than ever that my time entirely above ground.  At 49 years old, I need to move forward with “something else” besides my main life as a salesperson.  I won’t be able to do what I do now for 20 more years.  So to prepare for a life of creating, I need to hone skills and start to lay a foundation that will carry me on into retirement (semi- I don’t ever see myself completely retired) and give me the ability to be completely self-sufficient when it comes to earning income.  What does this have to do with solitude?  I find that if I can’t even find the time each day to write a daily note to myself, I can’t expect this to be my next career.  I’m fighting against the odds, my family, and my inner demons (who by the way have never wanted me to be creative – what are they hiding??) but I feel confident that if I could carve out two hours per day, I could move forward significantly.

 

How do you carve out time for yourself every day?  Do you crave Solitude as I do?

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