On a Plane From Dallas to Nowhere

At some point, on a plane from Dallas to Nowhere,
It hits me.  I am nothing without you.
I don’t want to be away from you Anymore.
I’m tired of the strangers I deal with,
I’m tired of the strangers I work for.
I’m tired of that look of disappointment on your face.
If I could show you my thoughts, you’d see the nightmares I deal with
Each time I must leave you.

Now it’s worse, knowing that you are fine without me there.
I have one mind that tells me you’re happier, and that’s good.
But another points out that you don’t need me for your happiness
And my soul darkens with that thought.
I need you every day, not three days a week.
I need to smell you when I go to bed,
I need to feel you often throughout the day.
I want to watch your transgressions and experimentations.
All these things require me to not be on a plane to Nowhere,
But to be somewhere with you.

I fear my instincts.  I know who else wants you
And I know what else he wants.
I have been to that place and found I liked it.
So I stayed, with your permission.
I, too, want to make him happy, but not by losing the one that
Keeps me sane, happy and loved.
But I will wait for you, each night, until he goes
I will take my 30 minutes of touching and smelling and
Be content.
If that’s all you have left to give me, I cannot be upset.
For I alone drained you of all else.
And I alone helped you become your best.

Photo by Steven Coffey on Unsplash

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